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BBW Dating

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BBW Dating links and advice - previous page.


Ianardo's

Bad Dating sites (BBW/admirer)

Here are some humurous tales of terrible BBW dating services I've come across since year 2000. Names have not been revealed. Needless to say, none of the sites described are linked to from here.

Do it our way or be punished!

Back in 2005, I tried a site that had become very popular due to some TV coverage. I was already a veteran of BBW dating sites, and could see several problems with it, but stuck with it because there were so many active members. But there was one really serious fault. Most commercial sites used a straight-forward system. If you had a profile, and wanted to contact another person, you had to become a paid-up member, then you wrote your message, and hopefully ended up in contact with a potential friend/lover. Some sites would insist that the recipient of a message had to be a paid up member before they could access incoming mail. Both versions worked fine.

The site in question allowed non-paying members to receive and read mail. BUT (!), the site guidlines stated that you were not allowed to enclose any contact information in any of your messages, and that they had software to detect any folk who broke this rule! Hold on... so how is anyone supposed to actually use the site for its purpose? The guidlines stated that you could only exchange contact information within their online chat-room. I contacted one of the staff and said that surely if the message sender and the recipient have forked out money to the site, they must be entitled to actually use it! The staff member said "yes", that is okay.

These strange rules were buried in a vast webpage of detailed guidelines, so how many users are likely to read through it all? I only read it because I vet sites for possible inclusion in my dating links page. At a much later stage, when I got fed up with the site, I started to push the limits to test what actually happens. I was aware that other people had been caught out by these rules and had been told off. When they detected that I had broken this rule, I received a message telling me off, and that I had been suspended (even though they had my money for membership to use the site for the purpose I was using it for). They added that if I sent a grovelling apology, and promised never to be naughty again, I would be allowed back in!

Let's rewind to early 2005. Having spotted numerous issues, I decided to highlight just two of them to the site owner. Complaining to any business often reveals just how good or bad that business is. The incompetent business people are always defensive to any criticism which is why they rarely improve. The first issue I raised was that the way their search results 'refreshed' the webpages, caused one to miss a lot of profiles (unless you browsed by opening new browser windows all the time). The CEO (don't you just love grand titles from a small business!) missed the point of what I was highlighting.

The second issue I highlighted was that ladies' profiles had rather muddled references to their dress size. If you're going ask for dress size at all, then surely just ask? The CEO thought that would be rude. So why ask at all? And these profiles also had descriptive references to body parts including the lady's bust. So is that any less rude?

The rest of his message was hilarious. He said that they had done market research and therefore "know how women think"! I'm sure they generally think a lot better than he does! I always take the "market research" phrase with a pinch of salt, because a lot of folk don't know what really thorough research is, or how to do it. And those with a passion for a topic, such as "size acceptance", will already have learnt a lot before going into business.

While awaiting the CEO's response, I tried to apply to their affiliate scheme. It was the only scheme I've come across where you have to write to them just to find out the details and terms of the scheme. It's usual to put these on a webpage (slaps fore-head!). They never replied.

The last time I was at that site, I decided to make use of their resident agony aunt. It was so rare to get a reply from any ladies at that site, that I thought I would ask the agony aunt why. Guess what? The agony aunt never replied either!!!

A few years later, they finally changed the system for members contacting each other, to the normal common-sense system. But they forgot to change the information in both webpages that explained things, leaving conflicting instructions. They eventually closed down.

Once you're in, you're in for life!

A lot of dating sites don't want you to delete your profile, because they like to show that they have lots of members. A few make it very hard to leave. One site had been completely unsuccessful for me, having made no contacts at all. One lady did send me an "I'm interested" notification, and her profile mentioned how rude it is not to reply to messages. I messaged her and she never replied! I decided to delete my profile but it took some searching to find out how to do this. One had to generate a security code that would be sent to my email address, and then enter the code on their site to delete the profile. A bit long-winded? I tried it, but the code did not appear in my email. I tried again only be to told by the site that you can only generate a code once every 24 hours! I spent a few days trying, and sometimes the code did appear, but failed to work when entered. After a great many attempts it finally worked.

Another site stated that they could not think of any possible reason why anyone would ever want to delete a profile, and recommended against it. The mind boggles! How about these reasons: 1) The website owner is a crook? 2) The website owner is an idiot? 3) The service is a rip-off? 4) The service is wonderful and I've found a partner. Thank you :)

Poaching

One of the most outrageous BBW dating sites started around 2000/2001. I noticed that its portfolio of profiles seemed to grow rapidly. I recognised a few ladies in the profiles and even knew some of them, but was puzzled that some of their details were incorrect. I soon twigged what was happening. At a time when there was a proliferation of free BBW dating sites, this new commercial one was poaching profiles from lots of free sites. Then they would charge people to message people, who had no idea that their profiles were on a paid site! And the site owner had evidently filled in missing profile details by making things up.

Huge... absolutely vast!

Don't get excited. My title doesn't describe a person, but claims of a dating organisation that I tried out within the first few years of the 21st century. Their database of profiles actually covered a great many niches, not just BBWs and admirers, and many of their profiles were old abandoned ones, with no dates showing when they were last active. Their feature for searching profiles was woefully inadequate, and only after a few years did they mention plans to improve it... maybe... some time. You could not search for basic options such as non-smokers.

They ran a scheme to rival traditional affiliate schemes, to promote and expand their business. They denounced affiliate schemes as no good. Their scheme required folk to buy a domain name and hook it up to their database of profiles. That meant you could effectively have your own personals site, perhaps attached to your own BBW related site. But the people in the profiles would have no idea of all the many and varied sites their profile was appearing in. It was one of the most expensive sites to join.

What a cut-throat business this is.

Around about 2003, I noticed another new commercial BBW dating site getting established. Unfortunately they had no scruples at all as to what methods they used to get widely established. The first thing I noticed was that they were spamming countless BBW community sites with promotions, often against individual group rules and to the annoyance of group owners. After they had got banned from many groups, there was a sudden and widespread influx of recommendations for their site, claiming to be from satisfied customers. If you've ever read review sites for consumer products, and seen several over-the-top glowing reviews posted within a short time-frame, then you will know exactly what was happening!

Next, they started to get more sneaky and post links to recommended products, such as books. But the link had some extra code that would cause a pop-under to appear taking you to their site. Meanwhile, they had been pestering me to add a link to them. At one stage, they asked me to add code to my website, so that when a visitor leaves it, a pop-under would appear for their website. Why on earth would I do that huge favour for them, while ruining my reputation with my visitors?

Eventually I did actually try their service just out of curiosity, but it was certainly not the best. Then they started an affiliate scheme with one of the affiliate companies. Since affiliate companies have rules of good conduct, this site finally started to behave in a civil manner, but it was too late as far as I was concerned, having earned my disrespect.

How much do you weigh?

Is that an impertinent question? Yes! I used to use a free dating site that was geared more towards the extra cuddly among the ladies. Unfortunately, it tended to attract feeders who annoyed some of the ladies (perhaps most of them). The owner was keen to have every profile showing the person's weight and height. It was the weights displayed that seemed to be attracting feeders, because if a lady reduced the weight figure, the harassments ceased.

The owner then sent out a message to some advertisers claiming that their weight appears to be incorrectly stated, in relation to their height. He gave them just 2 days to 'correct' the figure or else they would be deleted. And this message was sent out on a Friday, so it could easily be overlooked for 2 days. I actually received this offensive message myself! Yes, it was stated that I could not possibly be that light weight for my height. In fact, the figures were correct. So I'm a thin man - is that a crime? His site was permanently deleted from my links.



BBW Dating links and advice - previous page.



More pages of interest for full figured ladies:

Clothing Index UK

Clothing Index USA

Fitness Tips for Extra Cuddly Ladies

Fashion Advice

Relationship Issues

FAQ for this website

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Website started 4th March 2001